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Idea is good, but my english is poor.

I always say: I use the language similar to english language. Most of people who's speak in english can understand me even if i use it as the three yaer old child

Paul

edit: three year old child

what do i mean? that's a total crazy idea. maybe it's good for a students and people, which have a much redundant time.

Do you mean it? Crazy? Why? I think it is good. Most of us have no time to order "the real english lessons" i.e. onversation. This is a good place to have another people for conversation.

Paul

of course, it's good for real english conversation, but i brush(i'm brushing ;) ) my english at www.criticalsecurity.net.

A Pályavasúti Üzletág alapvető célja, hogy a biztonság - mint alternatíva nélküli tényező - mindenkori szem előtt tartásával az infrastruktúra üzemeltetése és annak fejlesztése EU-konform rendszerben, hatékonyan és racionalizáltan valósuljon meg; átlátható módon felhasználva a költségvetési és egyéb forrásokat, a környezetbarát vasúti infrastruktúra versenyképességének növelése érdekében.

OK, but because my english is as poor as host's too, only one dialogue between George and Condi

George: Condi! Nice to see you. What's happening?
Condi: Sir, I have the report here about the new leader of China.
George: Great. Lay it on me.
Condi: Hu is the new leader of China.
George: That's what I want to know.
Condi: That's what I'm telling you.
George: That's what I'm asking you. Who is the new leader of China?
Condi: Yes.
George: I mean the fellow's name.
Condi: Hu.
George: The guy in China.
Condi: Hu.
George: The new leader Of China!
Condi: Hu is leading China.
George: Now what are you asking me for?
Condi: I'm telling you Hu is leading China.
George: Well, I'm asking you. Who is leading China?
Condi: That's the man's name.
George: That who's name?
Condi: Yes.
George: Will you, or will you not tell me the name of the new leader of China?
Condi: Yes, sir.
George: Yassir is in China? Yassir Arafat is in China? I thought he is in the Middle East
Condi: That's correct.
George: Then who is in China?
Condi: Yes, sir.
George: Yassir is in China?
Condi: No, sir.
George: Then who is?
Condi: Yes, sir.
George: Yassir?
Condi: No, sir.
George: Look, Condi. I need to know the name of the new leader of China. Get me the Secretary General of the UN on the phone.
Condi: Kofi?
George: No, thanks.
Condi: You want Kofi?
George: No.
Condi: You don't want Kofi?
George: No. But now that you mention it, I could use a glass of milk. And then get me the UN.
Condi: Yes, sir.
George: Not Yassir. The guy at the UN.
Condi: Kofi?
George: Milk. Will you please make the call?
Condi: And call who?
George: Who is the guy at the UN?
Condi: Hu is the guy in China.
George: Will you stay out of China?!
Condi: Yes, sir.
George: And stay out of the Middle East. Just give me the guy at the UN.
Condi: Kofi.
George: All right! With cream and two sugars. Now get on the phone.
Condi: (picks up phone) Rice here.
George: Rice? Good idea. And a couple of egg rolls, too. Maybe we should send some to the guy in China. And in the Middle East. Can you get Chinese food in the Middle east??

Recently, I was searching the net for scientific progress in development of artificial intelligence. (I am a big fan of A.C.Clarke's HAL supercomputer introduced in 2001: A space Odyssey novel).

I found web pages about "Loebner Prize". Each year an annual prize of $2000 and a bronze medal is awarded to the most human-like computer.

loebner-prize.html

These pages led me to A.L.I.C.E - The Artificial Linguistic Internet Computer Entity.

http://www.pandorabots.com/pandora/talk?botid=f5d92 2d97e345aa1

Butter

Everybody can talk with her. It is funny.

A.L.I.C.E knows some facts about HAL (ask her), and when I say "sing something" - she begins with "Daisy, daisy..."

She is good

Human: what did you eat today?
ALICE: Ah. ALICE eats electricity.

Do someone have other ideas about interesting questions for her?
I then tried:
Human: who are your friends?
ALICE: Hugh Loebner, Robby Garner, and Steven Spielberg.
Human: oh you have famous friends
ALICE: Yeah that's right. What makes you think I have it?
Human: Steven Spielberg is a famous movie author
ALICE: I think Steven Spielberg is more than that.
Human: why?
ALICE: Because Dr. Richard S. Wallace programmed me for it

She is good

aaaaa, I found a bug :

Human: oh i didn't know that
ALICE: Dude! So I have taught you something new, unknown person.
Human: My name is Milan, not unknown person
ALICE: How are you doing, Milan not unknown person.

妆广告大片性自由之都 阿姆斯特丹上流社会的

热门约会地·时尚配饰 细致优雅

全球七大收费最高的酒店·猪年银币全套上市
拉里·埃里森的狂人日记·山顶洞人专用鼠标

Are You meaning "WTF?"

Tvé oči září. = Your eyes september.
Ležela na mezi. = She lies on between.

Paul

sausage of lovers - parek milencu
Springcelebrate Hedgehog - Jaroslav Jezek
damage to speak = škoda mluvit
don’t wake up a swan = nebuď labuť
relax in the living room = odpočívej v pokoji
where she married herself, here she married herself = kde se vzala, tu se vzala

A dokaze nekdo spravne rict vetu: "She sells sea shells on the sea sore."

Ehm, povedal by som že by to malo byť ...sea shore (kukni do slovníka what does it mean sore )

Inak mi to pripomenulo túto skvostnú vetu:

If two witches would watch two Swatch watches,
Which witch would watch which Swatch watch?

Sorry, jasne ze sea shore. Tady mas jedno studene , ale pozor na sore throat.

Christopher The Bastard from AfterSpoons and WithoutSatellites

(Kryštof Harant z...)

Once upon a time, there was a forum unknown to the evil Spam Robots. They couldn't understood the strange language used. But one day, they discovered and analyzed the use of english language. And that could mean only one thing - PROFIT!

"I want to be your Santa Claus", said the first robot. "Good site!, come visit you more often" agreed the other.

And the Spam robots plagued the forum for years...

"I want to be your Santa Claus", said the first robot. "Good site!, come visit you more often" agreed the other.

And the Spam robots plagued the forum for years...

lol. fantastic.

Američan ubytovaný v hotelu Slovan na pokoji č.222 volá do recepce: "Two rums to room two two two..." A z recepce se ozve: "Tram tara ra, tram tam tam, debile!"

Zcela náhodou jsem narazil na tohle:

Seděla na mezi - She was sitting on between
Necítím se dnes ve své kůži - I am not smelling myself in my leather today
Mistr světa v tancích na ledě - World champion in tanks on ice
Dršťková polévka - Das Gesicht Suppe
Fotbalový výkop - Footbal excavation
Na zdraví! - On the health!
Nemá to cenu - It doesn't have any price.
Basa tvrdí muziku - A prison makes music stronger.
Mám se velmi dobře - I've got myself very good.
Pustila jsem ho k vodě - I have released him to the water.
Pro mě - za mě - For me - behind me ...
Kdo do tebe kamenem, ty do něj chlebem - Who with a stone into you, you with bread into him.
Postavit vodu na čaj - To set a water on a tea.
Mít z pekla štěstí - To have a fortune from the hell.
Mohli byste prosim zavřít okno? - Would you mind pressing ALT+F4?

Last line is the best.

Ted jsem narazil na toto: watch proste nema chybu.

I'm going to install Videodownloader.

Anybody here can speak now?

Paul

I can, but just a little.

Hi,

how are you? I am tired now and want sleep

Paul

good night.

good hunt

fuck.html

(Normálně, když tuto větu někomu ukazuju, tak postupně zakrývám slova od konce)
Oh Johnny, do not touch me.
Oh Johnny, do not touch.
Oh Johnny, do not.
Oh Johnny, do!
Oh Johnny!!
Oh!!!

Hallo world!

I don't know. Halo world only.

Hallo all the Universe. I am here in Czech Rep., member of EU. I live in Earth - it is the 3th planet. It is a good place to leave (my opininon only).

Paul

Ok. Aštar Šeran.

I had to thought Remca don't speak english. Really, he don't. Or no?

I think you don't speak English as well. Your English seems like a programming language.

Kdysi (to uz je cca dvacet let) me lektor ucil prisprostlou (velmi dlouhou) basnicku o dedkovi, ktereho babka poslala do mesta pro kachnu a dala mu na ni dvacet dolaru. Dedek, jdouci zpet kolem bordelu, smele smenil operence za styk. Pamatuju si z toho uz jen:

"Duck for fuck...
...or fuck for duck?

Twenty bucks for fuckin' duck!!!"

Když jsem dělal zkoušky na dálce, měli jsme ještě ruštinu. Dostal jsem otázku "Richtěr". Věděl jsem vo něm kulový, akorát, že na něco hrál. Tak jsem se nadechl a zvučným hlasem suverénně spustil:
-Richtěr igrál charašó na gusle...
-Jééžiššmarjá!!! Vylítla ruštinářka ke stropu a šla se opláchnout studenou vodou.
-Za prvé, Richtěr byl bólšij pianíst a housle ani neuměl držet v ruce, za druhé housle se řeknou rusky skrípky. A za třetí to si jdu zapsat, protože učím ruštinu už dvacet let a tohle jsem ještě neslyšela.

No jo, rustina... Klasiky typu "Vo vremja kanikul ja sprasil svaju sistru" ci "Dasvidanija - sabaka" pominu. Spoluzak meho kamose prohlasil pri zkousce, ze "ujéchal na kóle" na dotaz ucitelky, jestli to mysli vazne, vyprodukoval "áňo" .

Měls jí říct, že to byl bolšoj hakejíst (nebo jak se to píše). To by jí teprve vezli. něco jako Kozinova a Kosínova věta z jednoho filmu.

Pravda, hokej se taky hraje .

begin
I think you don't speak English as well. Your English seems like a programming language.
end.

Asi tak .

Wtf??

We are the Borgs. You will be assimilated. Resistance is futile.

Do not use poor grammar. Try to follow these simple rules :
- Verbs HAS to agree with their subjects.
- When you write sentences, shifting verb tense is bad.
- And don't start a sentence with a conjunction.
- It is wrong to ever split an infinitive.
- A preposition is a bad thing to end a sentence with.
- Don't use no double negatives.
- One-word sentences? Eliminate.

Thank you. I can understand some of your rules not all. My knowleadge is on "practical" level, i am not on the "university" level with my english.

Feel free. I don't speak czech well too even it is my native language.
Regards,

Paul

Anybody?

Best regards,
Paul

My english is very very poor, glossary is my best friend...

I have to use my English for almost 6 hours a day thus I am going to ignore this topic. Enjoy folks...